Langbahn Team – Weltmeisterschaft

Talk:Great Lakes Crossing Outlets

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Great Lakes Crossing Outlets/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: AmericanAir88 (talk · contribs) 23:38, 4 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]


(Non-administrator comment)After reviewing Tri-County, I decided to take this review on as a result of your dedication and commitment. Same as last time, I split issues up into Major and basic. Major are GA criteria based which could be grounds for quick failure or discussion. Basic is usually copy editing and other issues to satisfy the GA criteria. AmericanAir88(talk) 23:38, 4 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Major Issues

  • No Copyvios
  • No deadlinks
  • No Tags
Passes Major Issue section

Issues

  • There are duplicate links with Bed, Bath, and Beyond, Nordstrom, and Summit Place Mall
  • Fixed.
  • Some date issues in the references (38,39,41). Please stick with MDY.
  • Fixed.
  • "due to financial issues of the original developer"
Who was the original developer?
  • Fixed.
  • "Herbert Miller, then the chairman..." > Herbert Miller, the then chairman
  • Fixed.
  • Proposed anchors included the outlet divisions of Sears and J. C. Penney, along with Phar-Mor, which only had one other location in Michigan at the time, and Bed Bath & Beyond and Waccamaw Pottery, which did not have any Michigan stores at the time.
Weird sentence that is run on. The frequent "and" are the main problem.
  • Fixed.
  • The first history section paragraph needs to have better sentence structure. Frequent commas are not as polished as smaller sentences.
  • Fixed.
  • "Further delaying Western Development's construction of the mall was a threat of foreclosure from the Union Bank of Switzerland, a bank which had loaned that company the money to acquire the land in 1989." > Further delaying Western Development's construction of the mall was a threat of foreclosure from the Union Bank of Switzerland, which loaned the money to acquire the land in 1989.
  • Fixed.
  • Plenty of times you mention "retail analysts". Who were the analysts?
  • Added a few names for clarity.
  • The sentence starting with [Taubman had...] and ending with [outlet divisions (Last Call, Off 5th, and Nordstrom Rack)...] needs to be reworking. It feels like a straight directory and is run-on.
  • Fixed, took out most of the names since some of them didn't actually open in the mall.
  • The sentence starting with [Tenants confirmed...] may need to be addressed as it lists businesses that were already mentioned. However, it is up to you as it could work.
  • The sentence starting with [A directory...] may need to be addressed as it lists businesses that were already mentioned. However, it is up to you as it could work.
  • Moved some around.
  • Rework the sentence with the word "Industry experts". It is a Weasel word and could be replaced with just the organization.
  • Fixed.
  • "a marketing specialist"
Who? Where were the from?
  • Clarified.
  • " a division of Books-A-Million which specializes in used books and media."
Citation needed or another citation to bemoved
  • I piped the link to Books-A-Million since 2nd and Charles is mentioned prominently
  • "In January 2015, Great Lakes Crossing Outlets introduced Sea Life Michigan Aquarium by Merlin Entertainments. It is one of only two aquariums in Southeast Michigan."
Citation needed
  • "Legoland Discovery Center opened at the mall in 2016."
Citation needed
  • Sources added to both above.

Comments

(Non-administrator comment)@TenPoundHammer: Great work on paraphrasing and editing this article. It is an interesting story. You passed all major issues so now its just the normal issue that are above. AmericanAir88(talk) 19:49, 5 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Quelle: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Great_Lakes_Crossing_Outlets