Langbahn Team – Weltmeisterschaft

Talk:22Kill

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment

This article was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment, between 22 January 2020 and 27 June 2020. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Mary Mijares. Peer reviewers: Natasha.Holdt, AAnonymous Bear, Rpaylor, 23gobears, Jerrysong1324, EstabanMiranda, Stphjoey, Natasha14738.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 16:41, 17 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Lengthening Article

Article seems well documented with neutral tone. Reads like an encyclopedia. Would recommend lengthening this stub to discuss more about the organization including any major successes the organization may have had as well as if/where there are physical locations. Jerrysong1324 (talk) 04:12, 15 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Added Context

This article does a great job laying out information in a non-biased tone, but many details have been left out in summarizing information. Things like what specifically inspired the founders to start the non-profit, who was involved, the progression and statistics of the social media movement, and impacts that the movement made would be great additions. Rpaylor (talk) 17:58, 17 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

More Information

In the introductory paragraph, there could be more information added about the collaboration between Carry That Load and 22 Kill. Clarification should be made as to whose motto is listed, Carry That Load or 22 Kill. More information should be included about the significance of the Honor Rings Program, especially if it grew into a widespread social media phenomenon like the 22 Pushup Challenge. In the "History" section, more information could also be included about 22 Kill and the 22 Pushup Challenge. Bribrisweet (talk) 06:44, 8 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Peer Review

Article flows well and presents a neutral point of view. Top section gives a short and concise summary of what the organization/movement is. This is a good start, and as you progress to adding more information as well as more sections, it would be great to provide the key stakeholders (i.e. the founders of the organization, key celebrities who have taken the movement to the next level, etc.). The top section of the article could perhaps provide more statistics and numbers on the effect of the organization/movement, maybe with one of the partnerships that they have. 23gobears (talk) 16:32, 17 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

I think that some parts of the introduction could be moved into the history section or a separate heading. (I'm thinking about the second paragraph?) I also think that there is a lot of flexibility regarding the structure, so based off of the information here, it might be good to keep the "History" portion and expand more on the "multiple programs;" here's a good chance to expand on the social media aspects such as the hashtag and different online platforms used. Mary Mijares (talk) 02:27, 18 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]


Peer Evaluation

Peer evaluation directed at the MoveMe group working on this article: I think the introductory sentence of the article is actually very comprehensive. It touches on the main point of what the organization is and what it sets out to accomplish. However, I think there’s potential to edit the rest of the introduction in a way that expands the overall article. There are references made to Carry That Load, 22 Pushup Challenge, and the Honor Rings program. I feel like it might be beneficial to split these different campaigns or programs into their own sections in the article. This would provide an opportunity to provide more information and context for not only these programs, but 22Kill overall.

Since the group’s research and topic had a focus on the 22 Pushup Challenge, there is likely a lot of information that can be added about the challenge and its social media presence. The history section already mentions the hashtag going viral so it might be easier to create a flow from the history section to a new section about the challenge. Additionally, adding any research at all about these programs will help the fact that the article seems to be lacking in its cited sources.

I’m not sure if there’s a lot of available information on this, but it might help the overall continuity of the article if there’s a section discussing the effect of the organization. Evaluating the impact can be done in an unbiased manner by focusing more on the quantitative results.

The current article seems to be neutral, not arguing a particular opinion or bias. However, this is likely due to the lack of information written. As long as the neutral point of view is consistent when more information is added, the article will be really great! — Preceding unsigned comment added by Natasha.Holdt (talk • contribs) 02:11, 18 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

This organization is one of the most important assets;not only for our fellow comrades who have served/or sadly have become one of the statistics of probably the most unknown/spoken issues which is claiming far too many lives of our freedom fighters/our service men and women each and every day. Einomommy (talk) 13:30, 18 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Review

Article: 22Kill The article does a great job explaining the high-level purpose and mission of 22Kill. The information is very well summarized, but it lacks significant details about the history of how the #22pushupchallenge actually raised the money. It might be a great idea to separate History as how the challenge came about and took off as an online social movement, and then have a section that summarize the results of the engagement. Lastly, it might be a good idea to mention the multiple programs that were created through those partnerships and add how each program helped address the issue affecting veterans. Great article, I cannot wait to see the final result! EstabanMiranda (talk) —Preceding undated comment added 06:05, 18 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Peer Review 2

Article: 22Kill This article succeeds in laying out the very basis of the movement though has many inconsistencies or holes throughout. It also is not very lengthy and needs some more development. Expanding on what the 22 push-up challenge is and its effects in the wider sphere, as well as how their establishment of mental wellness programs went, would be a great way to start. It would be useful to highlight its shortcomings, as well as any achievements in its creation and development. The sources they have are pretty good but, as the article develops, it may be useful to search for more sources, especially academic/scholarly ones. NatalieRH (talk) 07:25, 18 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]